Yesterday I had a bit of a wobble. Those numbers are getting quite low, and as I faced my first day back in the UK with all the lovely wetness and greyness that brings, I forgot all the great things I have achieved over the past few weeks and months, and could only think of the things I hadn’t achieved.
Sure I’d had an amazingly active and liberating week and a half in Spain. But what about all the beer and wine I drank? What about all the bread, cheese and sweets I scoffed? My brain ran through it’s familiar self-sabotaging pattern…. “That’s it. I’ve ruined it. May as well give in now.” …. as it reached for a brownie.
I know I’m the only freak in the world that has these sorts of moments, so please stop reading now if you are sick of my whining…
… but maybe some of you might find this pattern familiar?
I wish I could say I didn’t eat the brownie, but I did. And unsurprisingly it didn’t make me feel any better.
What it did do was make me revisit why I started this whole thing at all.
What has this marathon and this crazy crusade against sugar been about anyway?
Here are the reasons that I am committed to keeping on going – no matter how scary it gets.
1 // I’ve never followed something like this through in its entirety, and I need to prove to myself that I can do it. So many times I have got close to the end of something and given up. Scared that I might fail? Scared of what I might achieve? Not this time.
2 // I need to heal my gut so that my body can stop working against me. I don’t want to keep living a life led by cravings, fatigue, moodiness, sluggishness, bloating.
3 // I’m tired of being a sugar addict. There are much better ways to comfort myself than with food and alcohol. Time and time again, I have proved that these things only make me feel worse.
4 // My body has already given me a glimpse of how capable it is. I want to know what it could do if I give it the best nutrition I can.
5 // I want to give myself the best chance possible to run the New York marathon in under 4 hours.
6 // I want to make good nutrition and exercise an ongoing priority and habit in my life.
7 // I want to have boundless energy and vitality to bring to everything I do.
8 // I am no longer content to sit in the shadows and hope something happens to change my life. I am going to be that change.